How Survivors Secretly Prepare to Leave

Leaving an abusive situation is a significant and often challenging decision. For survivors in Nelson, British Columbia, preparing for this transition requires careful planning to ensure safety and security.

Assess Your Situation

Understanding the dynamics of your relationship is crucial. Take time to evaluate your circumstances and identify any immediate threats to your safety. Consider whether you have access to support networks.

Create a Safety Plan

Develop a safety plan that includes strategies for leaving and ensuring your safety during and after the departure. Here are some steps to consider:

• Identify safe locations you can go to, such as friends, family, or shelters.
• Establish a code word with trusted friends or family to signal that you need help.
• Plan your escape route and avoid discussing it with anyone who may not support your decision.

Gather Important Documents

Collect essential documents that will be necessary for your transition. These can include:

• Identification (passport, driver's license)
• Financial documents (bank statements, credit card information)
• Legal documents (marriage certificate, custody papers)
• Medical records

Financial Preparation

Having financial resources can significantly ease the transition. Consider the following:

• Open a bank account in your name only.
• Save money discreetly, if possible.
• Explore community resources for financial support.

Emotional Support

Leaving an abusive situation can be emotionally challenging. Seek support from trusted individuals or professionals. Therapy and support groups can provide a safe space to process your feelings and experiences.

What to Bring / Document Checklist

• Personal identification
• Financial information
• Legal documents
• Clothing and personal items
• Important phone numbers

What Happens Next

After leaving, it’s important to take steps to ensure your continued safety and well-being. Consider the following options:

• Change your locks and security codes.
• Seek legal advice regarding custody and protective orders.
• Stay connected with support networks and professionals.

Frequently Asked Questions

• What should I do if I am in immediate danger?
  Call local emergency services right away.
• Can I take my children with me?
  Yes, but consider consulting a local attorney for guidance on custody issues.
• What if I don’t have money to leave?
  Explore community resources, shelters, and financial assistance available in Nelson.
• How can I protect my privacy?
  Use secure and private communication methods, and consider changing your phone number.
• Is it safe to talk to friends or family?
  Choose those who are supportive and trustworthy and avoid discussing plans with anyone who may inform the abuser.

If you want local help, you can privately browse lawyers, therapists, shelters, and hotlines near you at DV.Support.